Planning for the future: Hope

On the first week of Advent may true love gave to me....


For those unaware, Advent is the 4(ish) week time period before Christmas. Advent (for Catholics) is a time for fasting and preparing our hearts (not just our homes) for the Christmas miracle: God becoming man. Divine nature becoming human. For me, I am embracing lectio divina of the daily Scripture readings.

This first week of Advent centers on the theme of HOPE. As I read through today's readings, I kept this theme of HOPE in mind. Of those words, what communicated HOPE to me? Today, what spoke to me is this verse from Psalm 122:

Because of the house of the LORD our God, I will pray for your good. 

What follows is my morning meditation on this line. (Everything that is indented and italicized represents God's voice; italics that are not intended represent my own thoughts in this dialogue.)

 Because of the house of the LORD our God, I will pray for your good. 

Behold, the plans I have for you:  

 plans to give you hope and a future, plans to prosper and not harm... 

(Jeremiah 29:11 - from memory - so may not be entirely accurate)

I always thought I wanted to know God's plan for my life.

Like, could you just show me the blueprint? It would sure make it a lot easier to trust, you God. 
Ok, then - what about just the big one? Will I get married? Will a boy *finally* love me? 

...and naturally, if I knew "the big one" then I'd *obviously* know I'd be a mom. ...and none of the other things in my future would matter.


Isn't that the beauty of a calling? God speaks a truth to our hearts - one just for us: "this is the way; walk in it." In response, we look over our shoulder for clarification, "Uh, this way? This way, God? Ya sure? ...ok, so this way..."

I know the plans I have for you. Plans for hope - plans for a future - for your good. Listen. I will tell you the way you should go, whether to the right or left. Just listen.

Um, ok God. But I really don't want to screw this up.

I know.

But I think it would be a lot easier if you'd just let me in on the plan. Dontcha think? Then I won't screw it up....

Jessica. (I raise my head, but don't make eye contact)

Jessica. Look at me. (I look up, and the drop my gaze)

Look at me. I know the plans I have for you. Plans for a future - of hope. You know the plan I want most for you, though? Besides the doing and the achieving and the rushing around ... I want  you to know you are loved. You have worth because of who you are; because you are mine. I want you to know how good I am; the hope I bring; the peace that settles into your bones from being in my presence; the security of a future where I am. 

What you will do - where you will live - who you will marry - who you will influence: those feel like the big things - I know - but, (look at me) they really are secondary.

Really.

I know. It's sort of mind blowing, isn't it?

Yeah, yeah. I know society makes your think blah-blah-blah...I know. I've been upending societal norms for a while now....

(I digress) Back to the reality: Seek me first.

Seek me first and all these other things, they will come. In time, in due course - in a way you won't expect - don't fix your eyes - or your hope - there. Just keep your gaze on me. Tune your ears to listen to my voice. You're in for the ride of your life, trust me. I am praying for your good.